Today I woke up at a 30 out of 10 on the frustrated with everything feelings. It wasn’t a great day but I got some laundry done and my daughter was amazing so really no complaints. I have come to terms with the idea that meditating is working. Also that 30 is very bad and I don’t know why?
Normally a person with a day off does things like relax, listen to music and try to decompress. I don’t because I overthink everything. I like to keep things a particular way and it’s the only way I control it. I have a list of things I want to do right now.
Organize the kitchen
more laundry
clean dishes
clean the bathroom ( which includes the cat box)
sort out the fridge
This list will go on but again I overthink everything. If I’m thinking about work I always think about routes and what changes have been made that I normally have to hunt down because no one is good at communicating. Which brings me back to communication and overthinking. It’s by default a problem for me and everyone who deals with me. I’m often working on it and have come to the conclusion that sometimes I just need to give up.
At home I try to do the same thing at work. I build a routine and think it’s most frustrating that I don’t have the same control. The control isn’t the problem also it’s the fact that I repeat the same things over and over and over and it’s treated like I don’t say anything. I don’t know how to take no offense from it because it’s not an offensive move on anyone’s part. This will be an ongoing thing…